All That Matters Is You

Sometimes I write from personal experience.. other times I take from other people I know or know of and their experiences.. I put myself in their shoes..

Here is the scenario: two people who are into each other but are not “together” in the traditional sense of being boyfriend/girlfriend.. they are technically single but see each other on a mostly exclusive basis.. of course people would have plenty to say about this unconventional arrangement..

Here are “my” thoughts:

To Mystery Gentleman Caller:

It’s like this.. I really care for you.. but we’re not together in the traditional sense.. You’re the man in my life and I’m the woman in yours.. we do things together and apart and both have feelings for each other.  People keep wondering how or why I’d be involved with someone in this type of situation! It’s very simple actually.. I am secure. 

I know how you feel about me and you know how I feel about you.. there is no need to question it.  We are not in a relationship because we have things to do before dragging each other into each others lives so deeply.. Sure I want to be with you totally and am sure you feel the same.. but if you can’t give me 100% then I wont short change myself, especially when I know I can’t give you 100% either. 

The fact is, it’s not about what I want.. it’s about who I want!  I want you and I’ll take it how you give it to me just like you’re willing to take whatever I have to offer to you!

I don’t believe I am settling.  How could I be? I am single as far as definitions go and I can go be with anyone I want.  And even if we stopped dating (or whatever you want to call it) I could pick up the pieces much the same way I would if I was breaking up with  a boyfriend.. I’ve worried about getting hurt, but the fact is being in a relationship won’t prevent you from hurting me or vice versa. 

Time wasting is never an issue because I enjoy whatever time we have together.. I am not pining away waiting for you.. I am out enjoying my life and doing my thing the same way you are.. but I am stuck to you like glue.  There are parts of me that I will share only with you for the time being.. I won’t be naive so we’ll only speak on what I know for sure and leave it at that. 

Am I waiting for you? I guess you could say something like that.. If I ever decided I no longer wanted anything to do with you.. I’d just stop dating (or whatever you want to call it) you!  It’s pretty much that simple.. I can walk away if I ever feel the need to..

But today.. I am pleased, happy, comfortable.. You’re my companion, my friend, my much more than anyone could imagine.. Nothing matters but our feelings for each other.

A relationship is defined as “an emotional or other connection between people.” It is not defined as two people committed to titles or going steady (#throwback).. it’s an emotional connection.. When it comes to relationships.. it is the emotional bond that helps us to sustain.. not the titles & following the traditions of courting laid before us.. we make the connections work the best way we know how.. the thing that matters most when it comes to relationships is that the parties involved are happy with each other and the state their relationship is in.. if just having each other around is enough then so be it..

I have been faced with “titleing” a few times.. and the only thing that does is give you a possesive term to dish out when questions are asked.. I have no problem with giving or taking on titles.. but it is not necessary to define the type of relationship I am involved in.. if I say “we are dating” what I truly mean is “I really like him and he really likes me and we hang out and are possibly sexually involved but we haven’t made an exclusive commitment to each other”..

As long as I am happy and he is happy with whatever we are doing.. there is no need to question it..


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