I’m STILL Not Coming To Your House … Boy

There is a reason that I like men.. they are always trying to prove something.. case in point.. this lovely fellow who pointed out all the “silly” notions (oh wait here’s the exact quote “dumb ideas”.. boy bye!).. I have about dating and some other bulljive.. Anywho.. this is what he wrote to me (and on his blog) as a response to my movie nights post.. My commentary is in.. pink cause I’m feelin quite girly ta-day.. #whysoserious?!

1. Movie night is not code for “let me try to hit that.” (45% of what men say is code for “let me try to hit that”.. #FACT) Movie night is code for “I was planning on staying in and watching a movie and it’d be somewhat more enjoyable if you came over and watched it with me.” (lazy) Guys want to know if a girl will fit into his life without turning everything upside down. You don’t have to change yourself to fit into our world, we just want to make sure you’re not going to try to change our world to suit you. Inviting you to do things we were going to do anyways is the best way to do that. Also, it reminds you that our plans aren’t contingent on your participation.

1(a). All guys want to get into your pants (no freakin duh!), regardless of what you do on your date. If a guy’s not trying to sleep with you, he’s either a gutless coward, or getting plenty elsewhere. Or you’re uggo (hehehhe uggo).

1(b). “No funny business,” does not mean “no funny business.” It means “Be cool and there’ll totally be some funny business.” (No “funny business” means, “no funny business unless I try some funny business”.. in other words.. I agree)

2. We want to know what type of person you’re like before we expose the world to you. We need to see what you’re like in a controlled environment before we risk taking you out into public where you might mistreat waiters, but rude to any friends we happen to run into, or just cause a scene for no good reason. (ehh.. take the risk.. SPEND THE MONEY)

3. Getting to know a guy doesn’t give you any real assurance that you’re not going to be raped or murdered by him. Getting to know him just means you’re probably going to end up like a whole lot of other women and overlook obvious signs of creepiness or douchebaggery and forgive him when he mistreats you. Better to get a good gauge of his criminal tendencies before you’ve grown attached. (Again I agree)

4. No dates are creative. Every date you ever go on has literally been done before. (I literally laughed out loud at this because 1. it is true and 2. creative and unique are not synonyms.. hence the use of the word creative.. it doesn’t matter if it has been done.. we just want you exert a little effort)

4(a). We don’t want to do all the work on the date. Dates are a way for people to get to know each other and enjoy each other’s company. Only a fool sets up his date to be nothing more than an intensive test where he is on trial and the girl is judge, jury and executioner. (He who asks shall plan.. she who accepts shall have fun)

5. None of you is pure an innocent and we know it. Stop pretending otherwise. When you act all prim and proper at the start but then reveal a freaky side later, you’re just going to find yourself with a guy who wanted the prim and proper girl. That’s why he was dating her! He wasn’t dating you secretly hoping you’d be someone else. He was dating you hoping you were you. (this isn’t about pretending to be someone you’re not.. it just means that we like to give a little mystery.. men supposedly like the chase .. so we let you get your roadrunner on)

||The Superior Sex Has Spoken||

Even though I listed many reasons women don’t generally like to spend the first date in a mans home.. it boils down to one point.. uncomfortableness.. the home is usually the place where a person is most comfortable.. if you are not comfortable with a person at the time of invitation to their home.. rejection is more likely to happen..

**Furthermore.. to the fellow who felt the need to dispute everything I said.. the post you referred to was a listing of women’s thoughts about movie night.. not a listing of men’s thoughts or idiocy.. #getoveryourself

And lastly.. as customary.. thought I’d point out how serious I am.. ahh not that much.. Enjoy.. and umm.. visit ol dudes blog & tell him what you think about his grasping of my “silly” notions oh and btw.. its “Single… And Looking?”

Thank you, come again!

**editors note** this post and the one before are to give men insight into WHY we are not big fans of movie night ESPECIALLY on the first date.. The statements reflect our thinking towards the opposite sex.. Our thinking IS generalized until the exception(s) come along.. So don’t be so damned sensitive with your fragile man-child egos and suck it up.. This is what most of think of you until you prove us wrong..

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One Response to “I’m STILL Not Coming To Your House … Boy”

  1. You’ve gotta be hitting up the world’s largest crack pipe if you think you can generalize dates and male intentions.

    The thing about the male psyche is that you could go on the same date with a man 30 times, and each time, he will have a completely different intention.

    Obviously a movie night as a first date will not work with most guys, but are you trying to tell me that you’ve not met a guy who just made you feel at home and comfortable after 20 minutes of talking (this is my area of expertise, I tend to get girls very comfortable very quickly)

    Once a woman is comfortable, nothing is more mood (non sexual) raising than the embrace of a warm male’s arms, and if you disagree, you must be a heartless bitch or a lesbian.

    I have had movie nights with girls, where I’ve wanted so many different things from the same situation.

    Sometimes I’ll want to get her naked as fast as possible, and could give a shit less about a movie. Other times I really want to watch a movie and would love to have a girl’s company throughout it, for the occasional kiss during the boring scenes. Most of the time it is really just because I love showing a girl how much I care, by giving her light massages while I hold her real close to me. If I want sex, a movie night is a great way to get it. However, movie nights do not = sex. Most guys will cower at the first hint of female rejection on these nights, and several guys are very conservative for the first few dates to begin with (unless alcohol is involved)- thats just how America is.

    As far as date creativity/uniqueness goes…

    STFU. I’ve never gone on a traditional date, and if the girl is vibing with me positively, it actually doesn’t even matter if we’re playing mini-golf with the limbs of dismembered children. Girls say “I love spending time with you” not, “I love spending time with you, at JC Pennys, because you have excellent shopping skills and mall intuition”

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