Take The Hint

stewieI believe that I’m a pretty intelligent person… However, I tend to be VERY hardheaded… I also believe that if I want something, I should be able to and will get it… when it comes to men, these traits can be disastrous…

These characteristics have caused me to:

-date men because they are attractive no matter how (insert negative trait here) they were
-pursue men who weren’t right for me
-act on emotion rather than logic

I tend to get in a lot of trouble by following my deceptive little heart, or by pursuing my wants without regard to logic…

Usually, there are plenty of warning signs telling me to stay away…

My love life is like a scary movie.. starring me as curious white girl.. I see this big, scary abandoned house and instead of keeping it moving, I walk up to it.. when I knock on the door and it creaks open, I don’t leave.. I walk inside.. you know the rest.. I somehow make it out alive for the sequel (and trust, my love life has more sequels than Friday the 13th)..

So on to these warning signs, I get them all the time.. Usually they are in the form of words spoken.. and instead of running, I walk right into a swinging door of confusion, heartache, annoyance (take your pick)..

Where do I usually run into problems?


Of course..

See, I’m grown and I appreciate sex as much as the next adult.. I love to talk about it and explore sex, but that doesn’t mean that all I’m here for is to be sexed and left..

And I KEEP running into men who want to do nothing more than hit it..

Now, since Im being honest.. there have been quite a few times where I’ve only wanted to have sex with a guy.. nothing more, nothing less.. but I’m on something completely different at the moment..

I am in a place in my life where I want to date seriously… notice I did not say be in a relationship… DATE..

Dating means I am getting to know someone, figuring out if I would want to be in a relationship with them in the FUTURE (not the near future either)…

I want to spend quality time learning a person, having fun with them.. do the whole movie and dinner thing.. hang out on a Saturday doing nothing.. you know? Date..

But I keep running into men (that I like) who aren’t “on the same page”… they always say things like “I don’t want a relationship right now”… (again, I don’t want to be in a relationship right now either, I just want to get to know you dummy)

Unfortunately, their alternative to “the wrong page syndrome” is to have sex with me.. Umm WHAT!? hitandquit

This usually has me shaking my head because they know that I like them like that .. Anywho.. before they even come out with the whole “same page” chatter.. I’ve been thrown hints that.. they are only in it for the skins…


– “so when we gonna … (insert sexual reference here)?
– they invite you over to watch movies … after 10p
– before they hang out with you, they want to know “is it worth it?” “what’s in it for me?”
– they’ll mention something about being a terrible boyfriend, or how they don’t know how to be in a relationship (cue side eye)
– he may even say something like: “we’d never work in a relationship, but would have great chemistry in bed”

But usually…
– he doesn’t have time for a relationship (that damn word again) OR dating

Which should let you know that:
– he doesn’t feel the way about you that he said (men will make time for something they want)
– he will have sex with you, but never take you serious (even if he’s never mentioned sex)
– he will never date you (or be in a relationship with you), especially if he’s had sex wit you already
– you should RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!

Like I said.. I usually get these hints.. but I’ll be hardheaded for a while.. until I allow myself to take a look at what’s going on around me and decide to keep it moving… my hardheadedness doesn’t last long though.. just long enough for me to realize I like a person and be disappointed in their barbaric-ness (this usually happens within 2-5 days, there hasn’t even been a chance for a first kiss yet)..

Because I don’t end up having sex w/ the neanderthal’s… I end up without regrets and scars… but it causes me to look at every man with a little more scrutiny (so that I won’t fall for any games) and.. it causes me to be disappointed in some of these guys who I thought were “different” or “better than that”.. but then I realize.. they all have penises…

If you are getting these hints.. leave that skeez alone! For every man that doesn’t want you.. there’s one more piece of your man being molded for you…


-m. lauren.. sbf


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